It's Not Your Fault
by Scoligatr
Summary: Gohan always thought all of his friend's deaths were his fault. That never went away even after 7 years. It isn't until he helps a boy and his dog that he realizes that just maybe, what happened in the past wasn't his fault. A molecule of fluff, mostly angst. Friend's OC that only helps brings out the questions for Gohan to answer. Purely focuses on Gohan and his inner feelings.


**A/N: This story is for a good friend of mine! I used her OC - Raff in this, but the main focus is on Gohan and his inner feelings.**

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The pitter patter of droplets dripping down from leaves filled the area. It was a lazy Sunday morning; everyone was either relaxing or sleeping in. A child's laughter soon interrupted the quiet forest as well as the crunches of branches being stepped on by his loyal companion. Raff, a child of no more than ten, raced through the trees while his canine friend – Rusty, followed not far behind.

"Rusty! Catch boy!" The adolescent threw an oddly shaped twig towards the nearest stream. It landed with a low thump next to a patch of grass. Barking excitedly, the brown coloured dog sprinted towards the stick with vigor and proceeded to gnaw on it instead of bringing it back to its master. Not minding his mutt at all, Raff smiled and took a drink from the clear stream.

Meanwhile, back at the Son household, Gohan was stretching right outside the door. Extending his arms upwards, the teen loudly inhaled a fresh breath of air.

"Ahhh!" He exhaled as put his hands on his hips and looked up at the forest in front. "Nothing like a perfect Sunday morning." Gohan smiled and turned to look at the house behind him. Mornings, by definition of mornings, was when the sun's ray were half as strong as they normally were, giving off a nice luminescent glow to whomever was up and awake by then. The sort of warmth you would see when a mother would gaze down at her newborn in awe and love. In short, every Sunday mornings, his family would sleep in, especially Goten, which meant Gohan had a couple hours to himself, but not enough to go visit his friends. Quickly scribbling down a note for his mother, in case she woke up before he got back, the demi Saiyan advanced into the forest admiring all that nature had to offer.

"Psst! Rusty! Look!" Raff called for his four legged friend in a hushed but forced voice pointing at a beautiful stag just a couple feet away. The animal was grazing on some grass when suddenly a lone ominous crunch put it on high alert. Oblivious to the stag's actions, Raff carefully crept out of the bushes. A low pitched whine emitted from Rusty as he watched his master go towards the beast. Even the dog knew something was going to happen; but just in case, the brown dog brought out its animal instincts and crouched low, waiting to pounce at the first sign of danger.

"Hey… big guy…" said the boy carefully and as quietly as possible. He extended out a hand for the deer to sniff in hopes the animal would know he meant no harm. Before Raff could continue, an immediate shot rung through the area; birds evacuated the trees and a deafening silence consumed the forest.

The blast of the shot sent a rippling sound wave throughout the entire forest easily landing on the young Saiyan's ears. Gohan stiffened at the murderous sound. It was common for hunters to be roaming around here during hunting season, so without a second thought, Gohan brushed off any insecurities; that was, until a sharp scream echoed soon after.

"RUSTY!" Horror dripped off the word as the young child screeched his dog's name. "NOOOO!" In the split second that the bullet went off, the loyal canine had pushed its master away from harm, receiving the bullet to the chest. Taking the distraction as a chance to flee, the stag paid no mind to the two creatures and fled, disappearing into the deep forest. The hunter was no where to be found.

"HELP! ANYONE!" Raff wailed. Tears cascaded down the poor child's face as he helplessly shook his friend awake. Blood began to accumulate into a large growing puddle beneath the dog. The mutt rasped, lungs growing heavy, whining as he wearily licked his friend's hand. It was as if he was trying to reassure the boy that everything was going to be okay. This did nothing but make Raff sob even harder as he hugged his loyal companion closer to his chest.

The trees hummed past the demi Saiyan as he ran at full speed towards wherever the cries of help came from. No matter how long Gohan had lived near the forest, he never really got the time to fully explore the forest and commit it to memory; now he wished he had instead of sitting at his desk all day as a child. Heart pumping fast due to adrenaline, just as he was about to pass an unsuspecting area, the glimpse of dark red caught his eye. There, sat a boy softly sobbing in what now seemed like river of blood. Panic slowly made its way up towards Gohan's throat, but he managed to keep it down. He's seen worse. Much worse.

Walking swiftly up to the boy but still cautiously, Gohan inspected the situation in front of him. The dog was bleeding profoundly, but still managed to stay alive. It twitched every now and then, meaning it would probably survive for a couple more hours; it would more than likely be alive by the time they arrived at an animal hospital. The boy however, seemed to be in a state of shock. He didn't move and didn't even acknowledge Gohan's arrival.

Crouching down and bringing an arm to the boy's shoulder, the teen cleared his throat. It was then that the child shot up, startled and terrified.

"W-w-who are you?" He sniffed.

"My name is Gohan. What's your name? We need to get your friend to a hospital as soon as possible." When the child didn't answer, Gohan smiled, knowing full well of the cause. "Don't worry. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm here to help you." There was a pause.

"Rusty."

"What?"

"My _friend's_ name is _Rusty_. He has a name and you will call him by such." With a frown, the boy crossed his arms, trying to intimidate the young Saiyan. However, it was cut short, when he sniffed and tears began to form in his eyes once more.

Gohan smiled. This kid had quite the personality. He still didn't want the kid to run or for him to assume he made the shot, so Gohan still kept down low. Gently, the teen brought out his other hand to touch the dying canine.  
"Rusty is a beautiful dog. But he needs to go to a hospital."

"I know."

Both of Gohan's eyebrows rose. For a child so young to be so blunt, it was quite unusual.

"Then...we have to go." he said carefully.

"How? The nearest hospital for him is at least fifteen miles away..." The distraught boy shifted his legs, now taking on a more vulnerable position, staring at his wheezing companion. "By the time we get there...Rusty...Rusty..He'll..be gone...And..." He stopped, shoulders shaking uncontrollably.

There was no time for sweet talking now, the dog was dying and both boys knew it. Whatever was on the young boy's mind could wait. Right now, a life, no matter animal or human, was in jeopardy.

"Look kid, we need to get Rusty to a hospital now. We _will make it. Trust me._" Gohan's voice held authority this time, making the boy flinch. "What is your name?"

"Raff...and how?"

"Close your eyes Raff, and don't open them until I say so."

Raff deeply sighed, hiccuping slightly. The boy knew he had nothing more to lose, if Rusty died, then Raff's soul would more or less go with the creature. Without his best friend, he wouldn't even want to live in the world anymore. He closed his eyes, tensing when Gohan grabbed him and his dog.

The rush in his stomach threatened to come out of his mouth when without warning, he was hoisted up into the air and a strong gust of wind constantly pulled at his clothes. A cry elicited out from the youth as he could no longer feel anything at his feet. The only feeling was Gohan's arm wrapped securely around his waist.

"Don't open your eyes!" yelled Gohan when he heard the boy's cry. "Trust me on this. Please."  
Raff kept his eyes closed. Hope started to replace his fears. Maybe whoever this 'Gohan' person was, he would save Rusty's life.

Within minutes, the trio arrived at the nearest animal hospital. Gohan rushed in carrying the dying dog in his arms, surprising everyone in the waiting room. Quickly explaining what happened, two veterinarians raced to carry the dog into the operating room, leaving both boys to wait alone.

By now, Raff's eyes had been wide open. Once Rusty had disappeared into the double doors, the remains of the ten year old's willpower vanished. Falling to his knees, the boy screaming in agony at the thought of losing his best friend. Sadness covered Gohan's entire features as he watched the boy, an almost perfect image of himself during his childhood years.

"Hey..Raff..Let's go sit down over there." Gohan said softly. Picking up the boy, they made their way over to the awaiting benches. It was cold, but it didn't matter. During times like these, cold was the only indication of feelings.

"It...was my fault."

"What?"

"My fault...Rusty is going to die..and it was because of me. All me. It was my fault. All of it. My fault..." The boy seemed to be stuck, chanting over and over again that it was his fault. His tears never stopped as he looked Gohan in the eyes.  
"It's my fault." Raff said again.

"No." Gohan said sternly. "It's not your fault. It's no one's fault."

As if a thunderstorm hit the area, Raff abruptly stood up. Eyes reflecting off what seemed to be pure anger.  
"Don't you DARE tell me it wasn't MY FAULT. You don't know how it feels! I was right there! Rusty took the shot when I wasn't being careful! It was supposed to hit me!"  
His teeth were grinding against one another, spitting out the words into the demi Saiyan's face.  
"You don't know how it feels to lose someone close to you!"

/You don't know how it feels/  
Those words echoed itself into Gohan's mind.  
/You don't know how it feels/

Standing up to tower over the small boy, Gohan took his turn to look Raff straight into his eyes.  
"I _do_ know how it feels. I've lost more than just my best friend."

Raff let out a snort. "Oh _please_ Gohan. _Do tell._ Tell me how it feels!" He crossed his arms and repeated his stance that Gohan once saw back in the forest.

"How does it feel?" Now it was the Saiyan's turn to snort. "Nothing can describe how I felt when I lost my best friend. I was just five years old. He took a blast that was meant for me. I stood there, like an idiot and watched him painfully die. I was helpless, powerless. I was weak, yet I knew there was _nothing_ I could do. I stood in the way and he took the hit for me. I was _useless_." Tears were starting to form in his eyes. Sure, he had seen Yamcha, Tien, and Chiaotzu, die instantly...but he didn't feel anything for those guys. He didn't spend enough time with them, and didn't share anything with them like he did with Piccolo. Memories like these, Gohan just wanted to suck out of his brain and throw it away. It wasn't just Piccolo's death that he wanted to get rid of. It was everyone he's seen. Dad's, Krillin's, Dende's, even Vegeta's death. They were all just painful reminders of how weak he was, and worse how weak he is now.  
"There were countless more. I watched my father die right in front of me. Due to my own cockiness. I let the power get to my head, and now my mother and brother is without a father. And it's all because of me. It was all my fault."

The last few words echoed its way around the room, bouncing off the walls, repeating its bleak statement.  
/It was all my fault/

Raff stood speechless. The older person in front of him wasn't lying. Those were exactly how he felt right now, but there was no way he could compare to Gohan. But...did he just say it was all his fault?

"...Um. Gohan..if you're telling me it was your fault that your father and best friend died, why are you telling me that my situation isn't _my_ fault?"

The demi Saiyan stared dumbfounded at the child in front. That didn't make any sense. How could Raff not see that both of their situation were completely different? The boy's accident wasn't his fault at all, while Gohan's decisions were the ones that shaped the demise of his friends.

With a more assertive tone, Gohan took a step forward. "Our situations are vastly different Raff. What happened to Rusty was not your fault. You didn't know what was going to happen. Neither of you did. There was no way you could have predicted the outcome. It's not your fault at all."

Raff bit his lower lip. Gohan's words _were_ true...he didn't know a hunter was there. Neither of them did.  
"But..."

"Yes?"

"Neither did you."

Gohan's eyes grew wide. "What?" He managed to choke out.

Raff looked down but back up, confidence shining in his eyes. If there was anything he ever did, this would be the rare times where the child was certain he was right.

"Neither did you." He repeated. "You didn't know your best friend was going to protect you. I didn't know Rusty was going to protect _me_. You didn't know your cockiness was going to result in something bad. You couldn't predict it. You did what you did because there was nothing wrong with doing so. It wasn't your fault your friends died."

Pausing, Raff slowly added to his realization. "And...you're right...it wasn't my fault Rusty got hurt. It just happened, but I learned from it. He saved me. I'm saving him."

Gohan squinted at the boy. What was he talking about? This is different. It was his fault that Piccolo died that day. It was his fault Dende was killed by Frieza. It was his fault Dad died. Everything was his fault. The situations are different.

"It wasn't your fault. Things happen and there was nothing we could have done to stop it. We're the same." Raff continued. A low beep snapped both boys from their conversation. One of the veterinarians that Gohan had seen earlier, stepped out, plastering a smile on her face.

"Rusty is perfectly stable. He's going to be just fine. He's one lucky dog." Bowing slightly, the woman turned her heels and walked back into the room, wheeling out Rusty who was on a metal table, tail thumping excitedly but weakly.

Letting out a gasp of surprise, Raff beamed a smile so large, it was as if it would take over his head. Tears once again fell out of his eyes as soon as he saw his best friend alive and well. He ran up and hugged Gohan with as much strength as the boy could muster.  
"Thank you Gohan! I get it now! Thank you so much!"  
Without as much as a look behind him, Raff ran after the staff and Rusty into the hallway.

The demi Saiyan stared speechless after the boy until he could not see him anymore. The words Raff had said cut him deep, but as much as he wanted to accept it, there was still that part of him that wanted to deny everything he heard.  
/It's all your fault/ There it was again. Those words that lingered in the back of his head since seven years ago and even more so.  
/It wasn't your fault. There was nothing we could have done to stop it. We're the same./ As loud as the guilt was pounding in Gohan's head, Raff's voice was louder. Way louder.

"We're the same..." mumbled Gohan. "It wasn't my fault...?"

A tall buff figure stepped into the waiting room. His shadow loomed over Gohan covering him in darkness. Taking notice of the lack of light, Gohan turned around to see someone he knew very well standing there, arms uncrossed, with worry etched upon his green face.

"Gohan." Piccolo grunted. "I felt the distress in your chi, what hap-"  
Sudden scenes of his own death, Goku's death, Krillin's death and numerous amounts of deaths flashed across Piccolo's mind, causing him to growl in confusion. But before he could ask what in hell was going on, his sensitive ears caught Gohan's exhale of breath. Sometimes their bond confused the crap out of him.

"It...It wasn't my fault." The demi Saiyan breathed out. A lone tear escaped from his eye. Gohan continued to take steps forward until he was practically chest to chest with his mentor. Closing his eyes, Gohan smiled as he leaned onto Piccolo's chest. "It wasn't my fault." he repeatedly, barely audible.

Uncomfortable with such a display of emotion from Gohan in public, Piccolo looked around the empty hospital before resting his hand on top of his pupil's hair. He ruffled it lightly as a gentle smile made its way onto his face. Nah, their bond was just fine.  
"Yeah kid. It was never your fault to begin with."

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**A/N: Gah! Another story! So this is my second time writing a story, obviously still not going to be as good since my first one was just less than 24 hours ago! Sorry for adding my friend's OC in here but I needed a simple character who didn't know Gohan at all and have him be all accusing our young Saiyan of not knowing how it feels! I'm sure you all had that said to you one time or another.**

**Anyways, what I wanted to portray here - again relative to real life, is that as hard as it is to admit, sometimes there are just times where NOTHING is our fault. I've recently had friends whose parents got divorced who believe that the divorce was their fault. Others have had their pets get run over by a car unexpectedly and somehow they put all the blame on themselves when in reality, NOTHING was their fault. How could you have known your parent's love for one another ran out? How could you have helped or prevented that? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. How could you have known a Ford Mustang or a bright red Mercedes was going to come at 4:12:43pm and run over your dog? You couldn't. As long as you thought whatever you were doing at that time was okay, no risks were taken then it's never going to be your fault.**

**When you tell people you understand how they feel, and tell them it isn't their fault, yet you blame yourself for the same situation you were once in that it was indeed your fault - it isn't going to change their opinion. How can you manage to change another's feelings if you can't change your own. Not only that but what amazes me is the fact that people can easily see another's situation as bright as day and console it to them when to them they just don't know how similar their situations are. That's what I tried to explain here.**

**Just as our characters say, things happen. Things don't necessarily have to happen FOR A REASON. Sh*t happens and there's nothing you can do about it. No one can predict the future, and if they did, they'd make millions. You don't know what the next move is going to be. Life or death, you just can't know. Ever since Piccolo died in DBZ, and ESPECIALLY when Goku sacrificed himself to take Cell to King Kai's place in Cell's Saga, I felt that Gohan continued to blame himself even after 7 years. Which is why he became the person he was written as during the Buu Saga. Another feeling I had was every emotion that was shown when Gohan tried to become a super Saiyan was clearly shown to the audience right there. How could he have all those feeling if he still hasn't blamed himself for the deaths in the past and the deaths that were more or less going to happen in the future? The years he spent keeping it to himself without anyone knowing finally erupted allowing him to become a Super Saiyan. That's about all I wanted to say. When someone tells you, from the bottom of their heart, that it isn't your fault. Believe them. If not, then at least take it into consideration.**

**Thanks for reading! R&R please! *7***


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